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Kraid
Kraid Smash
Information
Species Kraid
Homeworld Brinstar
Series Metroid
Affiliation Evil
Gender Male

BU

FUU-

UHH

—Kraid

Kraid is a giant monster that is fought in Metroid. He's also just as likely as Ridley, and even a better rep. 

Why He's Better Than Ridley - AttributesEdit

Kraid has one hundred attributes that make him better than Ridley. They are:

  1. Kraid is smarter than Ridley.
  2. Kraid volunteers at the homeless shelter.
  3. Kraid knows how to dance.
  4. Kraid knows how to sing.
  5. Kraid can make cheesecake for two.
  6. Kraid can make spaghetti for four.
  7. Kraid knows how to count.
  8. Kraid can twerk.
  9. Kraid can twerk and sing at the same time.
  10. Kraid can spit out fireballs.
  11. Kraid can use his tails to attack others.
  12. Kraid can levitate.
  13. Kraid can play the guitar.
  14. Kraid can play the piano.
  15. Kraid can play the triangle.
  16. Kraid can teach you how to play the triangle.
  17. Kraid can beat you in Smash.
  18. Kraid can teach you how to beat him in Smash.
  19. Kraid can lie.
  20. Kraid doesn’t leave the oven on when leaving the house.
  21. Kraid gives free 3DS’s to kids.
  22. Kraid can make cupcakes.
  23. Kraid braids Samus’s hair in his free time.
  24. Kraid took care of Mother Brain when she became sick.
  25. Kraid carried Ridley home when he got drunk at the bar.
  26. Kraid kills Metroids without using ice.
  27. Kraid makes sure the Space Pirates pick up their litter.
  28. Kraid says no to drugs.
  29. Kraid supports human rights for everyone.
  30. Kraid defends Sakurai.
  31. Kraid allows babies to play on his body.
  32. Kraid devours babies.
  33. Kraid works in a hospital.
  34. Kraid cares for the eldery.
  35. Kraid cares for the young.
  36. Kraid memorizes the choreography for every Beyonce song.
  37. Kraid memorizes the choreography for every Lady Gaga song.
  38. Kraid promotes healthy body images.
  39. Kraid encourages exercise.
  40. Kraid is an excellent negotiator.
  41. Kraid knows more about Smash than you.
  42. Kraid teaches abandoned bears how to care for themselves.
  43. Kraid saved Pandas from going extinct.
  44. Kraid was the one that stopped the fight between Solange and Jay Z.
  45. Kraid was the one that made Robin Thicke’s album flop on the charts.
  46. Kraid told Miley Cyrus to quit doing drugs.
  47. Kraid helped Shulk fill out his Smash application.
  48. Kraid threw Krystal’s Smash application away.
  49. Kraid killed Geno.
  50. Kraid tried helping Ridley become smaller. 
  51. Kraid cleans his grandmother’s house for her.
  52. Kraid doesn’t procrastinate on his essays.
  53. Kraid helped his classmates not procrastinate on their essays.
  54. Kraid was the one that told Robin of Lucina’s situation.
  55. Kraid bought Lucina a push up bra.
  56. Kraid brought Mr. Game and Watch and R.O.B to Sakurai’s attention.
  57. Kraid welcomed Pac-Man with open arms.
  58. Kraid rubs Sonic’s feet when they’re sore.
  59. Kraid donates his change to charity.
  60. Kraid donates his time to charity.
  61. Kraid can make chocolate cake.
  62. Kraid can compose original songs.
  63. Kraid makes excellent covers.
  64. Kraid doesn’t spam the comments sections on YouTube.
  65. Kraid didn’t have sex with the intoxicated girl he met at a club.
  66. Kraid got Glee’s final season cut short.
  67. Kraid can do ballet.
  68. Kraid can play the maracas.
  69. Kraid doesn’t wear sunglasses indoors.
  70. Kraid is helping Mario learn how to smile again.
  71. Kraid is helping Luigi get a spine.
  72. Kraid has a Zen garden.
  73. Kraid prevents Pokemon abuse.
  74. Kraid devours Pokemon.
  75. Kraid was the one to expose the Illuminati.
  76. Kraid can twerk while on top of Samus’s ship.
  77. Kraid can break down doors.
  78. Kraid can go from his head voice to chest voice without his voice cracking.
  79. Kraid always wears protection when making love to his woman.
  80. Kraid never cheats on anybody.
  81. Kraid adopts puppies.
  82. Kraid adopts kittens.
  83. Kraid knows how to make excellent salsa.
  84. Kraid always invites everyone to his barbeques.
  85. Kraid invites almost everyone to his pool parties.
  86. Kraid took care of the White House when Obama was sick.
  87. Kraid took over development for this game when Sakurai was sick.
  88. Kraid got Iwata sick.
  89. Kraid got Wii Fit Trainer into this game.
  90. Kraid is great with kids.
  91. Kraid can type extremely fast.
  92. Kraid runs a mile every day.
  93. Kraid lifts weights every day.
  94. Kraid convinced his friend not to commit suicide.
  95. Kraid managed to stop an attempted robbery of a bank.
  96. Kraid doesn’t support pedophilia.
  97. Kraid saved a nun’s life during a tornado.
    Kraid

    He's actually smaller than Ridley.

  98. Kraid knows how to tap dance.
  99. Kraid loves everyone.
  100. Kraid is not too big.

Why He's Better Than Ridley - SizeEdit

If Ridley can be resized, so can Kraid. Kraid, unlike Ridley, is known by his size, but he was just as small as Ridley was in Metroid, so he can be that small again.

You see, Kraid is big. According to Smash canon, he's bigger than everything. Including Ridley. Which just isn't possible.
Kraid 3

See. SEE?

 But if Ridley can still ignore Smash Canon to be resized, so can Kraid.

Why He's Better Than Ridley - RepresentationEdit

While RIdley would represent the entire series (minus Metroid II, Metroid Prime II, and some Prime spinoff that no one cares about, but really, no one cares about any of those games in the first place), Kraid would represent Metroid, Super Metroid, and Metroid: Zero Mission. These are the most important games in the series, as they are the first game, the best game, and the remake of the first game. Ridley is in these games too, and he has a bigger role in two of them, but Kraid has the biggest role in those same two, as he's bigger than Ridley. He also represents the time when the games were good before the garbage known as Metroid Prime came out. It ruined the franchise by not including Kraid. While he was planned to appear, he didn't, meaning the Prime series was disgusting. Ridley was in them too, so by being in Smash, Ridley would remind everyone of the horror that is the Prime series. Other M was no better, as even Phantoon was in that. Ridley's clone was as well, but the game didn't have Kraid, so it was just as bad as the Prime series (and Fusion, while we're at it). Therefore, the game needs a Metroid/Super Metroid/Zero Mission rep, and Kraid is the only viable choice.

Why He's Better Than Ridley - DeconfirmedEdit

Kraid was deconfirmed better than Ridley, too! While Sakurai leaves us in the tension of not knowing Ridley's fate, it was revealed during a GameXPlain video that Kraid is a boss in Smash Run (what). He's still as popular of a request as ever, of course.

Why He's Better Than Ridley - SupportersEdit

Kraid has a ton of support, as seen on the list below.

Trivia Edit

  • Kraid is the strongest dragon that you've ever seen
  • He'll make you die, motherfucker
  • He takes up five screens
  • He'll swallow you whole
  • And then you'll go down easy
  • Then you'll be digested
  • And converted to feces

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