Birdo would be a totally far out and ultra rad character in Nintendo's new Super Smash Bros. for Wii U coming to stores on November 21st, 2014!
—MewtwoPlusTwo, the topic's opening post. If only we had known what would follow...
"I wish Birdo was in this game so my dad could dress up like him" was a topic created by user MewtwoPlusTwo. It centered around a young child who shared a very strong love for his father. The daddy dressed up in a Birdo costume and... well, shot his "eggs" on the child. The topic started off humble but it quickly took a dark turn, focusing on pedophilia, incest, rape and vore.
The topic lasted for 5 hours and 15 minutes, starting at 3:34 PM on November 11, 2014 and finally being shut down by the mods at 8:49 PM, long after the story and its sequel had been completed. It had roughly 375 posts on closure.
Zero_Destroyer has made two imgur albums compiling nearly 350 of the topic's posts:
Book 1: http://imgur.com/a/AL1eR#0
Book 2, Ending: http://imgur.com/a/pfu9g#0
On Saturday, June 13th, 2015, MewtwoPlusTwo made a sequel under his alt MewtwoMinusTwo. He hailed this as the true sequel and took advantage of the board's chaos over Roy and Ryu to do so. Once more, it was allegedly reported multiple times, but the mods let it complete. As of the time of writing, it's still up.
EDIT: The new topic entitled "If Sakurai was of true Christian faith, he would add Birdo into Smash as DLC." lasted only 1 hour and 21 minutes before it was shut down by the mods. MewtwoMinusTwo's account is currently suspended.
kid also took screenshots of the topic and uploaded them to Imgur.
Book 3: http://imgur.com/a/Lkz56
(Read the first one, then the last one, then continue from the top for the proper order.)
The second topic was deleted at around 68 posts, and MewtwoMinusTwo was suspended. But Birdo Daddy will live on in all of our mouth holes.
The final chapter has been promised by his new alt, MewtwoTimesTwo, as coming soon. And after that, we can all expect to see MewtwoDividedByTwo.
The Story Edit
*daddy dresses like Birdo and runs into my room*
SETTLE IT IN SMASH, BOY!
*he tosses an egg at me-- it splatters in my face*
YOU LIKE THAT OOZING DOWN YOUR FACE, BOY?
*i nod and smile at my daddy*
*daddy tackles me and we giggle and giggle for hours*
Daddy I sure do love you
I LOVE YOU TOO BOY
*daddy sucks my head into his Birdo mouth*
*we both smile*
*daddy giggles because me being inside of him tickles his mouth hole*
*daddy spits me out but I start crying-*
I want to go back in, daddy, please let me back in
BOY YOU ARE TICKLING MY MOUTH HOLE
daddy maybe you can get inside of me then
*i pull daddy into my mouth and he spits eggs inside of me*
daddy I don't like Birdo eggs
*i spit out a Birdo egg and it splatters on the wall behind daddy*
BOY YOU NEED TO GET A BETTER AIM BOY
*daddy shows me how to spit eggs and we laugh and laugh for hours*
GET OVER HERE BOY AND GIVE ME YOUR EGGS
*i cautiously walk to daddy who is holding a turnip- I'm scared*
Daddy I don't want to shoot eggs at you I love you
YOU WILL SHOOT THOSE WARM EGGS AT ME BOY NOW DO IT
*i shoot a Birdo egg at daddy and it splatters all over his face-- daddy is angry but excited that my aim is good*
DO IT AGAIN BOY
*i shoot multiple eggs at daddy now very fast*
BOY YOU GOT ONE IN MY MOUTH
*daddy gargles the egg in his mouth and I giggle*
daddy you are always so funny and cute, please let me inside again
OKAY BOY GET IN ME
*i crawl into Birdo daddy's mouth hole again and get cozy-- daddy is still gargling my egg so I get to be whished around*
heehee wheee daddy! I love you daddy please more!
*daddy swallows me whole*
*as I fall into his belly I giggle and feel warmth-- I can see many eggs from many different people down here*
*i notice a small white egg and I play with it, moving it in in my hands and then I lick it-- it's salty*
daddy, I yell to my daddy, why are there so many eggs in here?
*daddy laughed and it made me jostle in his loins*
BOY THOSE ARE THE NEIGHBORS EGGS AND THE MAIL MAN's EGGS
but daddy I thought you only loved my eggs?
*more eggs fell on top of me-- daddy was sucking eggs as we spoke*
I MISS YOUR EGGS BOY COME OUT OF THERE AND GIVE THEM TO ME
*i climbed my way up Birdo daddy's esophagus and he spit me out*
BOY I MISSED YA DOWN THERE BUT IT SURE FELT FANCY AND FREE
*we giggled together while daddy massaged my back*
are you ready for my big egg surprise now, daddy?
OF COURSE BOY I LOVE THE TASTE OF YOUR EGG
*i spit an egg into daddy's mouth and he fell backwards with pleasure, egg trickling down his mouth*
MORE BOY GIVE ME MORE OF YOUR SWEET EGG
*i spit another egg at him*
*we giggled a lot*
*daddy glared at me and I got scared*
BOY WHY DOES YOUR EGG TASTE SO SALTY HUH
daddy, I-- I-- I don't know *i whimpered*
*daddy was walking up to me, stomping and holding a chain*
YOU ANSWER ME BOY WHY IS IT SO SALTY
*my egg goo was dripping down his face but he wasn't happy*
I ate the egg of my teacher this morning, daddy. he said I had to because his Birdo egg was best.
YOU EAT ANOTHER MAN's EGG BOY? OPEN UP
*daddy opened my Birdo mouth really wide and spit eggs in*
daddy I'm too full of your eggs, please stop
daddy, mommy said that if you do things I don't like I should tell on you daddy
NO BOY YOU WONT TELL YOUR MOTHER ABOUT THIS
*daddy held me down and spit his eggs all over my face*
*my entire body was covered in Birdo daddy's egg juice*
daddy stop please
TAKE IT BOY
I'm too full of egg daddy please quit I can't handle more of this
YOU ATE ANOTHER MANS EGGS
*daddy sucked me back into his belly and he jumped around-- I was being pelted by other salty eggs, the juices covering me and getting in my mouth hole*
*i could feel daddy flexing his belly, his stomach pushing me deeper inside him*
daddy please if you keep pushing I won't be inside you any more! please daddy!
YOU SUCK THOSE EGGS AND SHUT UP BOY
*daddy pushed hard and I traveled through his loins and nether regions*
*i could hear daddy shooting his egg on the post man-- i only played with the post man once when I was 7 and his egg was bitter*
*egg juices from the post man traveled down and covered me*
daddy I'm nearing your bum please stop pushing!
I CAN FEEL YOU BOY KEEP GOING
*i saw the opening of the hole and the light that shone in*
daddy I'm coming
*i stuck my egg covered arm out of the hole and climbed out of daddy-- he wasn't ready for me and tried to shove me back in-- I went in and out a few times and the egg juice made me slippery*
BOY YOU STAY IN THERE UNTIL IM DONE
but daddy I love you and want to share my egg with you
*daddy forced me out and cradled me in his arms*
BOY IM SORRY I DIDNT MEAN TO HURT YOU
it's okay daddy now please give me some of your warm egg juice
*daddy cradled me and i reached up to feel his nip*
GO ON BOY IF YOU WANT SOME MILK DRINK FROM DADDY
*i pressed my lips to Birdo daddy's teet and tasted the sweet nectar*
daddy, this is really good
THE POST MAN LIKED IT TOO BOY
*daddy spit some egg onto his nip as I drank- he wanted me to experience every taste he had to offer*
*birdo daddy's tongue slithered out of his mouth hole, egg juices dripping all over my face*
daddy what are you going to do with that long tongue of yours?
BOY YOU NEED A WASHING AND A LASHING
daddy no please
*daddy Birdo shot a wad of saliva and egg juice on me, drenching me in warmth*
daddy I hate baths can you make this fast?
*daddy lathered me with his long tongue then dried me off with his Birdo mouth*
it's so warm and cozy being with you daddy, you're my favorite and I love you I want to experience everything with you!
*daddy lashed me with his tongue and it hurt but I did it for him because I love daddy*
daddy I'm clean I swear it now can I please enter you one last time?
*daddy bent over and let me crawl in from the back door this time*
*my body was very slippery and wet so I slid in easily!*
BOY GET UP IN THERE
*i did as Birdo daddy said and entered his lower intestine-- it was small but I wiggled through his manly loins until I could see the eggs up ahead*
my mouth is watering, daddy. I really want your eggs.
BOY YOU BETTER KEEP GOING IT FEELS NICE
*i kept crawling through Birdo daddy hoping to taste more of his sweet egg juices*
*daddy pushed hard and clenched his bowels around me, making it hard to breathe*
*just then when Birdo daddy clenched his small intestine an egg fell into my mouth-- I whisked it around in my mouth for a while and savored the salty sphere, never wanting to spit it out so I swallowed my daddy's egg*
I feel your egg trickling down my throat, daddy! I do it just for you!
I feel your bitter tasting eggs consuming me, daddy and I love it
*i clawed my way out of Birdo daddy's belly*
SON OMG WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
daddy I don't know I didn't mean to hurt you
SUCK MY EGG AND TASTE MY JUICES ONE MORE TIME BEFORE I PASS
*as daddy laid there dying he shoved his egg into my mouth and I sucked it until the egg juices poured all over me*
BOY YOUR MOTHER WILL BE HOME SOON
daddy please don't leave me with mommy she makes me drink her juices but they're not as good as yours please don't
BOY... I'M DYING GET INSIDE OF MY MOUTH HOLE ONCE MORE
*i crawled into daddy's hole- he closed his Birdo mouth around me tenderly and I stroked his long tongue*
*daddy had died*
Honey bear, it's your mother and I'm home, sweetie!
no mommy please
Baby, come here and taste your mother's milk.
no mommy, please stop
*mommy grabbed me and shoved me inside of her nether regions*
I was inside of her for three days feeding off of egg juices from the hair stylist
i died inside of mommy. she was nowhere near as sweet as daddy.
i miss Birdo daddy and his eggs
Thx u to everybody who read my story. It took a lot for me to tell it to strangers but im happy to get it off my chest
stay tuned for the sequel
I need an adult ;_;
This thread is going places.
GameFAQers looked on with shock, awe, horror, and amazement as MewtwoPlusTwo described the intricate details of his relationship with his Birdo dad. Most posters were so profoundly flabbergasted that only a reaction gif could fully encapsulate the emotional roller coaster they were experiencing. Despite the terror filling everyone's hearts, threats of moderation were instantly shot down by those gripped onto the story; the conclusion must be seen.
As a matter of fact, the GameFAQs Moderators seemed to love this topic more than anyone else. They allowed it to remain up throughout the entirety of the disgusting mature content filled story, moderating only a few posts from other users for getting in the way of their greedy fapping. At the conclusion of the story they apparently went their separate ways and put the whole thing out of their minds completely.
As of post #183, MewtwoPlusTwo revealed that there will be a sequel to the story, despite the character dying at the end. Judging off of the rest of the story's subject matter, there will probably be a lot of necrophilia within the new story. That is to say that MewtwoPlusTwo doesn't get banned before.
SPOILER ALERT: He got banned for this topic. Only after both it and the sequel ran their course, of course.
Thx u all again for the feedback. I just want it to be known that there is nothing wrong with this story. its just a father who dresses up like Birdo from mario and makes omelettes for his child.
—MewtwoPlusTwo, in response to the critics
The Sequel Edit
*i was 4 years old when I went trick or treating with mommy and daddy*
*daddy wore his best Birdo costume and mommy didn't wear anything because she wasn't there*
*daddy held my hand and caressed it as we walked down the street*
daddy I want some candy
NO BOY YOULL GET YOUR CANDY TONIGHT
but daddy I want candy like the other kids not just your tasty eggs
*daddy got mad and pushed me onto the ground and held me down*
*he pushed into me, I could feel his gaping mouth hole get close to my neck as he breathed heavily almost moaning*
daddy what are you doing
MAKING YOU TASTE MY MAN EGG BOY ILL SHOW YOU ITS JUST AS SWEET AS CANDY
daddy stop the other boys and girls are watching and im embarrassed
*birdo daddy spit up a hot load of egg juice all over my face-- I licked it up happily*
SEE BOY WASNT THAT GOOD
oh yes daddy much better than candy. we should go home now
*daddy picked me up and cradled me all the way home*
*when we got home he had a pretty dinner waiting for me with candles and wine*
daddy I'm not old enough to drink
*birdo daddy held me down again and poured the wine down my throat- I was suddenly very drowsy and didn't feel good*
daddy I don't feel good. will you come inside me and make me feel better?
*daddy stretched me wide open and climbed into me, spitting egg juice all over my insides*
daddy it tickles why are you being so soft? I don't mind the pain daddy.
I KNOW BOY BUT IVE GOT PLANS FOR THESE LOINS.
birdo daddy what are you going to do to me?
*daddy shot his eggs all over inside of me and I plumped up- I didn't know how much more egg I could take before exploding*
*daddy ripped a hole in my chest and climbed out. pieces of my flesh were all over the floor but birdo daddy was there to eat them up*
I DONT WANT TO WASTE A SINGLE PIECE OF YOUR DELICIOUSNESS BOY
*i awoke in my bed the next day, there was sticky egg juice all over me and my bedroom floor*
daddy! i shouted. daddy! where are you birdo daddy?
*i walked downstairs and saw mommy crying as she slithered out of birdo daddy's intestines*
mommy what's wrong, what's wrong with birdo daddy?
Now, honey bear, Birdo daddy is gone. He's shot his last juicy egg
but mommy I don't understand.
Honey boo, come over here and taste my nectar and I'll explain.
*mommy cuddled me in her arms before placing a stinky wet towel over my face-- before long I didn't wake up*
*mommy had murdered birdo daddy and me*
i miss birdo daddy a lot. some days I don't know how I make it through. I miss birdo daddy's sweet but bitter eggs running down my face, trickling down my mouth hole.
ill miss you birdo daddy.
If Sakurai was of true Christian faith, he would add Birdo into Smash as DLC.Edit
*daddy dresses like Birdo and runs into my room*
BOY WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT SMASHING THE MAILMAN
Daddy i'm sorry i didn't mean to make you angry
TOO LATE BOY
*daddy sucks me into his gaping mouth hole*
Daddy teehee this tickles my feet sacks too much
I LOVE YOUR FEET SACKS BOY NOW QUIT WRIGGLING SO MUCH
*daddy gargles me around in his Birdo mouth, the sweet, succulent juices of his own eggs start to drip into my mouth*
I like the taste of you daddy you're really salty
YOU BETTER LAP MY JUICES UP BOY OR ELSE
*daddy swallows me whole, i fall into his giant pit*
Daddy please help me! i'm drowning in your Birdo juices!
*this pleases Birdo Daddy and he jumps up and down, making his salty juice slap me in the face*
Daddy no! i can't breathe!
*i start to wiggle my tush to shake off his juice*
BOY YOU ARE TICKLING MY LOINS
*Birdo Daddy jumps up and down again making his Birdo eggs bounce around beside me*
Daddy one of your salty eggs just splattered me in the face and got inside my mouth
*i start to claw my way out of Birdo Daddy's belly, but Birdo Daddy uses his long intestines to choke me and tie me down*
Daddy please i don't want to die like this what if Mommy finds out
MOMMY WON'T FIND OUT BOY SHE IS INSIDE THE MAIL MAN NOW
*Birdo Daddy let out a laugh that shook my entire body, i jumbled around and hit his birdo insides*
BOY WHAT ARE YOU DOING UUUHHHNNNGGGG
*Birdo Daddy pushed real hard and i started to slip into his tubes*
BOY UUUUHHHNNNNGGG THAT FEELS TINGLY IN MY NETHER REGIONS BOY UUUNNNGGGG
*Birdo Daddy pushed really hard and my head popped out of his Birdo hole*
*Birdo Daddy sucked me back inside of his hole*
*Mommy walked through the door and saw Birdo Daddy sucking me in*
Oh honey, why are you sucking our baby inside of your Birdo holes? Haven't we talked about this before?
WOMAN YOU BETTER CLOSE THAT HOLE OF YOURS
*Birdo Daddy sucked Mommy inside of his mouth hole and she fell on top of me*
Why hello, son! *mommy giggled*
teehee hi mommy
*Mommy was pushed on top of me, i could feel her heat radiating on me as Birdo Daddy's egg juices seeped inside my mouth*
YOU LIKE THAT SWEET EGG IN YOUR MOUTH HOLE BOY
i do daddy, i really do. i would do anything for you Birdo Daddy
*Mommy started licking the walls of Birdo Daddy's loins and we both giggled inside*
teehee mommy this is fun
Yes it is, sweetie honey bear!
YOU BOTH WILL LOVE THIS
*Birdo Daddy ran outside and found the Mail Man and sliced him open to reveal his eggs*
THESE EGGS ARE MINE NOW IM GOING TO SUCK THEM INTO MY HOLE
*the eggs fell on top of me and Mommy and splattered us, we got really wet*
*we both giggled*
Honey bear booboo, we need to get out of here.
*Mommy sliced Birdo Daddy's stomach open and she fell out*
*Birdo Daddy tried to stop her but she clawed her way out, his flesh all over the street, but I was stuck inside of his egg hole*
daddy I want out of you please let me out
BOY YOU TICKLE ME TOO MUCH STAY IN ME
*Birdo Daddy suckled more eggs inside, white egg juices sprayed me in the eye*
heehee, i like this daddy but i want out i'm going to slide out your Birdo hole backside
Honey bear, you better not get dirty! *mommy giggled so did i*
BOY DONT YOU DARE
*Birdo Daddy pressed his loins together and I slid out of him, i was covered in brown sauce*
*we all giggled and held hands*
daddy look what i found when i was inside your hole
*I hold up an egg that is dripping with hot juices*
BOY THAT IS MY SPECIAL EGG MEANT ONLY FOR MOMMY
but daddy i found it i want to keep it
*I stick the special hot egg inside of my hole, its warm and tingly and sloshy*
daddy this feels really nice
*i gurgle Birdo Daddy's hot juices in my mouth*
JUST YOU WAIT UNTIL MOMMY GETS HOME BOY
*Mommy walks through the front door and looks scared*
Now honey baby bear, what did mommy tell you about gurgling down Daddy's Birdo juices?
*i am ashamed*
i'm sorry mommy but i just really love Birdo Daddy
BOY I LOVE YOU TOO NOW GET INSIDE OF MY HOLE
*Birdo Daddy viciously rips his pants off and sucks me into his brown hole*
wheeeee daddy, wheeee this is fun!
*we both giggle as I get slurped up*
*i can hear Birdo Daddy and Mommy talking with the Mail Man outside as i play around in Birdo Daddy's hot egg juices*
*i grab an egg and lick it tenderly, its salty and tastes bitter but i lick it more for daddy*
daddy why are there more eggs falling on top of me?
*i look up and see eggs falling, hitting me in the face and splattering all over me. i can hear noises from outside, Birdo Daddy is grunting and I can hear the Mail Man too*
daddy? why do these eggs taste like the mail man? daddy?
*i can hear Mommy giggling and the Mail Man grunting hard*
BOY YOU BETTER GET PREPARED FOR THIS EGG LOAD.
*the eggs slap me from inside, my mouth is now full of salty bitter egg juices*
BOY YOU BETTER DRINK THESE EGGS THESE ARE WHAT MADE YOU
That's right, honey baby bear booboo face, these eggs are your life source now.
mommy what does that mean? *i'm scared*
BOY YOU AINT GETTING OUT OF MY HOLE EVER AGAIN I LOVE THE FEELING OF YOU PLUGGING ME UP
daddy no i love you but i want out please daddy
*Birdo Daddy jostles me around his loins.*
i have to get out of Birdo Daddy and fast
* i think but i don't know what to do*
*just then i scrape Birdo Daddy's intestines and make him bleed, it is filling up inside and i'm about to drown in egg juice and blood*
daddy please i can't breathe
GOOD BOY YOU AINT ESCAPING, NOW WIGGLE AROUND AND TICKLE MY TUBES BOY
Honey baby face, please be careful inside Birdo Daddy. I love you.
BOY I LOVE YOU TOO
daddy, mommy please help me, i love you both so much
*i giggle because the eggs are filling me up and the blood is fun to splash around*
*just then i feel a familiar touch on my shoulder, i look behind me... it's Mommy's private part doctor Mrs. Eggings!*
Mrs. Eggings: you need to escape this black hole of Birdo Daddy, little boy. I have been locked inside for years after Birdo Daddy found out about me.
what do you mean gyno? i need help
Mrs. Eggings: you need to rip out the anus and let the blood flow. Your mommy has lots of blood floods every month.
what does that mean, mrs. eggings?
*i shove my arms outside of Birdo Daddy's butt hole and fling them apart, a large hole opens up*
BOY YOU BETTER STAY IN THERE AND KEEP MY HOLE SEALED TIGHT.
*i can see the light of day again as Birdo Daddy's blood flood comes crashing out of his now gaping Birdo butt hole*
Mrs. Eggings: you did it, little boy! you've saved the day! we're free now!
but mrs. eggings i like to be inside Birdo Daddy's mouth hole, his eggs taste salty and warm
Mrs. Eggings: Boy, you need to run, Birdo Daddy is not safe.
*i can hear Mommy outside giggling*
*a knife suddenly gets stabbed through Birdo Daddy's stomach wall and almost stabs me in the egg that is in my mouth hole*
*mrs. eggings chuckles and climbs out of Birdo Daddy's large ass*
*i tickle Birdo Daddy's hole one last time as i slip and slide out of his Birdo butt*
*i'm now bloody, covered in white egg juice and brown sauces, i look like a spaghetti dinner*
BOY MY TUSHY IS GAPING WIDE AND WET BUT I NEED YOU IN MY MOUTH HOLE GET IN ME NOW BOY
*i obey my daddy because i love him*
i love you daddy i will do anything to please you
*i climb inside Birdo Daddy's mouth hole covered in sauces, he gurgles me around and uses his tongue to clean me off*
daddy your tongue is so rough like a kittens tongue why is it so rough daddy?
*Birdo Daddy stops lashing me with his Birdo tongue and bites me*
ouch daddy, teehee, that hurts! *i start to cry*
BOY DONT YOU DARE CRY YOU'RE A MAN INSIDE OF MY MAN HOLE
*i stop crying and wipe my tears off with Birdo Daddy's uvula*
BOY THAT FEELS GREAT, SLURP MY HANG DOWNER INSIDE OF YOU
*i obey because i love daddy and eat his uvula, it tastes like pork*
*as i digest his uvula daddy starts to moan*
BOY THAT WASN'T WHAT YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO EAT NOW I'M DYING
*i hop out of Birdo Daddy's mouth hole and stand beside him holding his hand*
*he is dying*
BOY I WANT TO BE INSIDE OF YOU AGAIN
ONE LAST TIME
daddy no, my mouth hole isnt big enough to fit your whole Birdo body
BOY YOU BETTER OPEN UP BECAUSE DADDY'S COMING IN
daddy my mouth is open as big as it can go
*Birdo Daddy hops into my hole and fills me up*
*i can't breathe*
daddy, grrrggglegll i can't grrgglele breathe...
Honey Baby Bear booboo love, please spit out your Birdo Daddy, its dinner time, sillykins.
mommy grgltrl help meeeee
BOY I'M GOIN IN DEEP
*Birdo Daddy claws his way down my esophagus and i start to giggle*
teehee daddy i love when you're inside of me, go deeper!!
*Birdo Daddy lets me swallow him and he's inside of me, playing with my juices*
BOY HERE COME MY EGGS, HOPE YOU'RE HUNGRY
*Birdo Daddy fills my belly up with his salty creamy eggs and i get a belly ache*
daddy, please stop, i can't eat any more of your succulent eggs
YOU BETTER MAKE ROOM BOY
*to make room, Birdo Daddy tears out my lower loins and reproductive organs*
*he fills me up with his eggs even more, it hurts and i cry but i do it for Birdo Daddy as i love to please him*
i will do anything for you Birdo Daddy, please fill me up
*my pee pee is flowing blood like Mommy's own blood flood every month*
mommy am i a woman now?
Yes, my sweet baby bear, you are now a beautiful woman. Welcome to adulthood, my pet!
*i am happy now as i put on a dress, the blood from my wee wee staining my blouse*
BOY YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN LET ME GET INSIDE
daddy, no, i can't handle you anymore as i am now a woman and i love other men
WHO DO YOU LOVE BESIDES ME YOU BETTER NOT BE EATING ANOTHER MAN'S EGGS
daddy please stop yelling, i love you so dearly and would never leave you!
*we both giggle*
*Mommy looks sad that Birdo Daddy loves me more*
*Birdo Daddy and I start to do the happy dance on the floor, his egg juices mixing with mine and our blood and guts flying through the air*
*my lower intestine slaps Mommy in the face*
Now honey, as a beautiful woman, you cannot hurt your mommy, I am your role model now.
*i start to cry, my bonnet falling off of my head*
BOY YOU BETTER SUCK THOSE WET TEARS BACK UP INTO YOUR EYE HOLES
*Birdo Daddy grabs me and holds me close, lapping up my tears with his Birdo Daddy tongue, it's rough and stained with brown sauces*
mommy, Birdo Daddy, i want to go play outside with my friends
I'M GOING WITH YOU BOY I WANT TO MEET THESE FRIENDS OF YOURS AND SUCK THEIR EGG JUICES
daddy please dont, just eat my eggs please
*we go to the playground, the other kids love my Birdo Daddy as his purple skin and bow are pretty*
*we come back home and Mommy has a spaghetti dinner waiting*
daddy, you have a noodle hanging from your chest
BOY YOU BETTER GET OVER HERE AND SUCK IT OFF OF ME
*i slurp the noodle off of Birdo Daddy's naked body, the spaghetti sauce mixing with the stained blood and bitter, white egg cream*
daddy i can't tell if this is your egg juice or mommy's dinner please help
*Birdo Daddy giggles*
BOY THAT TICKLES MY BIRDO NIPS
*we both laugh as Birdo Daddy sucks himself onto my feminine nipples*
daddy omg you just sucked one clean off of me!
*Birdo Daddy suction cups his mouth hole onto my other nip and rips it off too*
there is blood everywhere, daddy and it hurts me
*my nipples are gone and blood is spurting from my nips and privates*
*i groan and cry*
Honey boo boo *my mommy says to me* you will be safe where you are going.
mommy what does that mean
Baby bear, Birdo Daddy won't be able to hurt you any longer...
*i start to cry and my vision slowly fades*
*when i wake up i am inside a small room, my flesh torn apart and blood on the walls*
*Birdo Daddy is in the corner eating my severed arm and spraying his eggs all over*
daddy what are you doing mommy said id be safe
BOY YOU WILL NEVER BE SAFE FROM BIRDO DADDY